Writing is like being able to put life into a snow globe. It takes the things that are too big and scary and reduces them into a form that I can put away when I want and look at from a distance. It also takes all that’s good in life and captures it into something I can take out when I want and look at close up and keep forever. It makes the bad things into something I can hold…and the good things into something I can hold onto. Both help so much that I need that little souvenir of life.

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Improper Poll: More Embarrassing Checkout Experiences

It's that time of year again for purchasing Thanksgiving groceries. I like to pretend that my grocery purchases are somehow sacred and that the store workers don’t notice what I’m buying. But I once went through the lane with nothing but a box of tampons and a large bag of chocolate…and the Checkout Dude and the Bagger Dude exchanged giggles.

This was a few years ago, so by now I figure they’re old enough to be married. And I hope their wives send them to the store for the chocolate and tampons, and I hope the checkers laugh.

Have you had any embarrassing Checkout Experiences?


  1. I added something to your list and made it a trifecta (am I using that term correctly?). I had hair dye, along with two boxes of OB's and some chocolate. The teenaged cashier took a long hard look at me and her eyebrows raised. I said to her (and tried to infuse some wry humor into it),"You'll be there some day..."

  2. There are times in her life when a woman just needs chocolate, and those boys have surely learned by now. LOL
    Wonderful, Tammy!

    Kay, Alberta, Canada
    An Unfittie’s Guide to Adventurous Travel

  3. You guys are funny. I like to pretend that I'm getting eye raising items for my grandma. I don't have a grandma, but what do they know.

  4. Perhaps such a purchase would have put the kibosh on my embarrassing checkout experience.

    In college, I made a Sunday morning trek to the 7-Eleven for a newspaper, soda, and little chocolate donuts. The clerk rang it up and said, "Thank you, sir." Let the record show that I do not look like a SIR. I had a girlish coif and the proper womanly parts. I was a soprano in the high school choir, for cryin' out loud! Jeans and a t-shirt should not create a gender identity issue in the eye of the beholder.

  5. I am lucky enough to shop at a super market where everyone knows me. Even if I got in line with Hershey's syrup, a can of whipped cream, a box of condoms, and a tube of Preparation H, I doubt that they would even notice, because we are too busy chatting about our day, our families, or how tired we are!

  6. After coming home from the hospital post C-section, I was far from svelte. While purchasing a box of diapers, the checker asked me when my baby was due. I only said, "Soon", and scrambled out the door, self-esteem in tatters.

    Critter Alley

  7. Haha! A noble purchase, to be sure, my friend.

    Embarrassing checkout experiences? Every week, when we buy wine. My father-in-law was instructed by his physician to drink a glass of wine every evening. And my hubby and I enjoy a glass or two on Friday and Saturday nights. And of course, we use it to cook with. And we want to be prepared for company. You get the idea. We usually march out with a LOT of wine. If they think we're drunkards, they never let on.

  8. I'm back to prove my first comment. I just returned from a $160 grocery shopping trip. This is twice what I usually spend, but it IS Thanksgiving week, and I am taking a dish to our daughter's house on Thursday. I found this yummy-looking recipe for a reduced calorie mac and cheese in Cooking Light, and my daughter wants me to make it. I just added up the cost of the ingredients and it came to around $37! For mac and cheese? for 7 people? That's a little pricey, eh? I also got two 13 lb. turkeys to put in the freezer for later. They cost me a grand total of $3.12 for both. Lindsay wanted to be sure that I got the right discount so she re-added my entire receipt. Obviously, she didn't look at the items, only the price, or if she DID look at the items, she was way too polite to comment. There was NO mention of certain personal items that a woman of my years should no longer even dream of buying, nor was there any wry smile when she scanned the travel-size bottle of vodka I bought (my cabinets are not very high, and we are not regular drinkers, so it is the perfect size.) She didn't even bat an eye at the two tubes of K-Y. What a sweet gal! I could have bought that huge quantity of wine that Lisa mentioned, since I do cook with it A LOT, but we have a terrific discount wine place here that I am checking out later this week.

  9. Someone (not me, seriously it wasn't) told me about an embarrassing experience at a pharmacy counter. Her hubby was too macho to pick up his perscription and sent his wife, who is in her mid 60s, to pick it up for him. She told me the young guy in the pharmacy could hardly keep a straight face asking her if she had used Viagra before or had any questions about using it.
    No way I would've done that.


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