Forgive me. I’ve just been dealing with so many of them lately...though I can't figure out if I actually draw them, or if there are just a lot out there. Here are:
10 Things People Have Actually Said to Me:
1.
Woman who was discussing plastic surgery with someone else at the table,
suddenly turning to me: “I bet I know what you’d have done! Boob job, right?”
2.
Same woman from #1: “Why don’t you get your dog shaved? Maybe they could
make him look like something! Because you know MY dog is a genuine Bichon
Frise! We paid ONE HUNDRED-SEVENTY-FIVE dollars for her!”
3.
Ditto again:” “Did you make that?”
Me: “Uh…yes.”
“I could tell.”
4.
And my personal favorite from, you guessed it: “I heard your grandmother
died and you got her furniture! How wonderful!”
5.
Above woman’s husband: “Who cares if our dog poops in your yard? She’s so
small.”
6.
Different woman who asked to see my garden, pointing to a plant: “Is
that supposed to look like that?”
Me: “Yes.”
“Oh. Huh.”
7.
Same woman in the same garden: “Is that something?”
Me: “Yes.”
“Oh. Huh.”
8.
Garden woman again, after I’d moved to a new house: “So are you going to
make your garden nothing but pink again?”
Me, laughing: “Yes. I do like pink and purple.”
“Oh. Huh.”
9.
Another one: “So what is your daughter’s major again?”
Me: “Biochemistry.”
“And does she have a boyfriend?”
Me: “I don’t know. She did, but I think they just broke up.”
(With conciliatory tone) “Well, don’t worry. I knew girls in college who
sat around and did nothing but study, and they turned out to be just
fine!”
10. Same woman from #s 1 and
2: “I’m thinking about breeding my dog. Because you know she is a genuine Bichon
Frise, and we paid ONE HUNDRED-SEVENTY-FIVE dollars for her!”
Me: “Oh. Huh.”
“Oh. Huh.” ~Pretty much
every passive-aggressive I’ve ever known
“She was a one-man verbal wrecking crew.” ~Overheard in Dr.’s office
waiting room
