Writing is like being able to put life into a snow globe. It takes the things that are too big and scary and reduces them into a form that I can put away when I want and look at from a distance. It also takes all that’s good in life and captures it into something I can take out when I want and look at close up and keep forever. It makes the bad things into something I can hold…and the good things into something I can hold onto. Both help so much that I need that little souvenir of life.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Improper Poll: Very Un-Playful Possum

Number one on my list of things to do this morning was “Dispose of dead baby possum on the patio.”  Not a fun start to my day.

I first discovered it when the dog showed me last night. I hoped it was playing possum as they say, but I kept conducting possum checks through the window, and if it was pretending to be dead, it sure was convincing. I enlisted the kids’ help. One of them surmised that the dog might have “squeaked” it, but we're not entirely sure how he could have caught it in the first place, being deaf and as legally blind as Mr. Magoo. 

I admired its acting ability when the rain came and it was still playing possum, but when the hail fell, it could have been nominated for an Academy Award. The flies this morning were the clincher, though I left the plastic bag open in the garbage just in case.

What’s the grossest thing you've done lately? (Sorry if this is lame. I had another question for you, but I've decided to save it till Wednesday.)


  1. Actually I personally didn't do it--I made Rod do it--EVERY TIME! When we were in Atlanta for several months last year, Mum's two cats would leave headless chipmunks in front of the patio slider almost every morning. No way was I going to pick up the bloody remains and hose off the patio! Rod's dad built that house, so I felt it only fair the Rod be the one to do the clean-up! Ditto for the RAT that they left at the back door one morning! I was trapped in the house until Rod cleaned up the messes.

  2. While riding on the Katy Trail this spring, I ran over a snake. I am hoping I didn't kill it, but I'm not sure, because my sister (who was behind me) said it slithered off the trail.

    I screamed and squealed for a while, imagining what it was like for the snake, having a bike roll over it...

    I could tell you about grosser things, like going camping with the Boy Scouts and having to use what they called a latrine. I could even make it a "scratch and sniff" comment, but I don't think anyone is ready for it.

  3. Birds fly into our patio doors every day at the moment. Most survive - some don't. Sometimes foxes dispose of the corpses, otherwise we do.

  4. Four year old Charlotte's snot, thick as a slimy green worm hanging from her nose down her chin. The last week of school I actually wiped it for the first time all year. Gag! I don't do snot. I can do any other yucky body fluid.

  5. Tammy, you're lucky the dog didn't bring the critter inside like some sort of trophy. Then you'd not only have to deal with the gross thing but with other gross things like dog mouth, dog fur, that spot on the carpet, etc., etc.

  6. I chewed on a hair in my vegetable beef soup. Granted, it was my own hair. And very clean. After all, I'd had a shampoo two hours prior to making the soup. And that hair got boiled. So...it was actually kind of a surgically-sterilized hair, full of protein, better for me to ingest than for my family. But still. I chewed on a hair in my vegetable beef soup.

  7. This is so interesting it actually reminded me of the movie called "The man who knew too little" the one with Bill Murray. The part where the guy is dead and Bill Murray keeps trying to get the "dead" guy to flinch alas he never does :)

  8. LOL Judie, I would have been trapped, too.

    Sioux, I've almost run over snakes on the Katy Trail quite a few times. It makes me wonder why the joke is about the chicken crossing the road, when I've never seen a chicken cross a road. And thank you for not making your "scratch and sniff" comment. Gak.

    Jabblog, you must keep your windows a lot cleaner than I do. LOL.

    Speaking of snakes, Linda, I think I'd rather tackle the ones on the Katy trail. This is one time I'm sorry you have such a gift for description!

    Pat, thank you for helping me put it into perspective. Been there, done that. Gagged till I cried.

    Hair Soup? Yum. If it's any consolation, Val, I've discovered much worse in my soup...after I was almost finished, too. Hmmm--might make a good future question.

    Good one, Josh. Have never seen that, but maybe I should. Wonder if I should be worried that I'm turning into a Bill Murray character as I age.

  9. "Conducting possum checks." Hahaha!

    Grossest? My dog came in with something in her mouth that I thought was landscape fiber she dug up in the wooded area in my yard. When I put my hand under her mouth and said, "Drop it," she wagged and obediently complied. It was not landscape fiber. It was a half masticated mole, dead as Genghis Khan and ooey-gooey as wet newspaper. In. My. Hand. Uuuggghh!!!

  10. I got here yesterday looking for your post, must have been playing possum. You poor thing, I always have to make sure the wildlife knows my girls are heading out.

    Birds... my gross thing for the month it seems.
    Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

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  12. (Removed my last comment due to a misspelling.)

    Oh, Lisa!!! Forgive me for laughing so hard. I'm sure at the time it was positively traumatic. And now I'm laughing again. Those last few sentences are priceless.

    Jules, I'm just pleased and flattered you bother to come visit at all! We had a dead bird incident recently as well. I usually warn the wildlife, too, but had never thought to do that at night!

    Oh, and P.S. Leaving that plastic bag open--especially a full five days before garbage day? Bad, bad idea. Gak.


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