Writing is like being able to put life into a snow globe. It takes the things that are too big and scary and reduces them into a form that I can put away when I want and look at from a distance. It also takes all that’s good in life and captures it into something I can take out when I want and look at close up and keep forever. It makes the bad things into something I can hold…and the good things into something I can hold onto. Both help so much that I need that little souvenir of life.

Sunday, February 3, 2013

Improper Poll: Name That Shoe

I admit it. I wear only named shoes. Oh, I don’t mean Monolo Blahnik or Christian Louboutin. I mean I name my shoes. It’s hard not to when they’re that butt-ugly.

I am the proud owner of a genuine pair of Herman Munsters, some Minnie Mouses, and some not-so-glad-iators. My sister obligingly spiced up my slipper-wear by giving me a pair of Neanderthal Mans for Christmas. I recently bought a pair of Wicked Witch of the Easts, but they tricked me by behaving very comfortably at the store and then turning wicked once I brought them home. I almost wish a house would drop on them (as long as my feet aren’t in them at the time).

The reason I love my butt-uglies so much these days is because there really was a time when I wore heels on a daily basis. Now I think of them as evil instruments of torture.
I once read that most women own their age in shoes—one pair for each year. I guess that means my shoes make me young, because I only own a small fraction of my age, mainly because I wear my favorites, the boring-but-comfortable Clark Kents, with almost everything at work. When I get home, I usually change into The Beloveds, a pair of old Reeboks.

Take that, Carrie Bradshaw. Do you own your age in shoes?


  1. Ha! I haven't named mine, and I though I do have a lot of them (most hand-me-downs from my daughter) I only wear a few. When I do go to work, it is in a dusty little office at a gravel pit, so there is no dressing for success necessary for me at work anymore.

    I am working on a post of my shoes though the ages though, and it is funny that you posted this ... we must be thinking along the same lines, Tammy! Thanks for your visit.

    Kathy M.

  2. I do not own my age in shoes. That would require an addition to the house.

    If I was going to name any of my shoes, I have one pair that I would call Kathy Bates. The Kathy Bates as Libby Holden in Primary Colors. That's because they're large, a bit unkempt, and tough as nails. I have another pair that I would call The Sock Slurpers.

  3. No way. I must be still in my teens--or probably more accurately I'm a pre-teen.

    When I'm home, it's just socks or my trusty Crocs. (They're the Butt Uglies all the other ones bully.)


  4. I can SO relate to this post. I wear flip-flops and frumpies. You made me laugh.

  5. My husband has a few choice names for some of my shoes because he thinks they are ugly, but they are comfy. That's what I go for these days. Definitely not my age in shoes, however, my sister should be ancient.

  6. I have plenty of shoes, but wear only a fraction of the total. These days it's all about comfort, comfort, comfort. And yes, I have a few beloved pairs of those Clark Kents, too!'

    Critter Alley

  7. It's a little odd that I don't name my shoes, because I name everything else. I love the names you've come up with, though, and will undoubtedly check my closet to see who is lurking in there, all paired up. :)


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