Writing is like being able to put life into a snow globe. It takes the things that are too big and scary and reduces them into a form that I can put away when I want and look at from a distance. It also takes all that’s good in life and captures it into something I can take out when I want and look at close up and keep forever. It makes the bad things into something I can hold…and the good things into something I can hold onto. Both help so much that I need that little souvenir of life.

Sunday, May 3, 2015

Succinctly Yours Week 215: Gone Fishin’ With Dwayne


It’s time again for Succinctly Yours, a micro meme cast forth by the delightful Grandma’s Goulash. Each week, Grandma thoughtfully dangles a photo in front of us to capture our imaginations so we can cook up a story of 140 words or 140 characters or fewer to go with it. The bonus word this week was “accentuate.”

The new fly-fishing equipment Pa thought would be perfect only served to accentuate Dwayne’s shortcomings. He fished all day long and didn’t catch a single fly.  135

Dwayne had heard you could catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, but he knew that was stupid. How would they get the vinegar on the hook, anyway?  126

Dwayne tried to popularize the sport of alfalfa fishing, but it never caught on. The alfalfa, that is—it wouldn’t catch on the hook.   110 

Squidward: Do you have to stand so close? You’re making me claustrophobic!
Patrick: What does claustrophobic mean?
Spongebob: I think it means he’s afraid of Santa Claus.
Patrick: Ho ho ho!
Spongebob: Stop it, Patrick! You’re scaring him!
~Spongebob Squarepants
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12 comments:

  1. Pat WahlerMay 3, 2015 at 6:33 PM

    LOL-all three were gems, Tammy.

    Pat
    Critter Alley

    ReplyDelete
  2. ValMay 3, 2015 at 6:52 PM

    Heh, heh. Vinegar on the hook!

    I guess he was fishing for grass carp.

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    Replies
    1. TammyMay 10, 2015 at 8:15 AM

      Ooh, good one! I didn't know there was such a thing as grass carp.

      Delete
  3. Sioux RoslawskiMay 3, 2015 at 7:07 PM

    Tammy--Everything you write is so clever and so out-of-the-box. Dwayne's a bright one alright...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Yamini MacLeanMay 4, 2015 at 5:00 AM

    Hari OM
    Hahahahahah these are excellent Tammy! I had a bit of a struggle with this one - you knocked the spots off me!!! YAM xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. TammyMay 10, 2015 at 8:17 AM

      I read yours. It didn't sound like there was any struggle! But thanks!

      Delete
  5. Lisa Ricard ClaroMay 4, 2015 at 11:13 PM

    Haha - the first one is my favorite. And all I could think regarding poor Dwayne is that he sounds like a match for the three Darrells from the old Bob Newhart show. :)

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    Replies
    1. TammyMay 10, 2015 at 8:17 AM

      Hee hee...that's who I was thinking of. I almost named him Darrell!

      Delete
  6. UnknownMay 11, 2015 at 3:35 PM

    Loved 'em all, as always, but especially the first one. It certainly accentuates Dwayne's ... talent?! Right?

    ReplyDelete
  7. TammyMay 11, 2015 at 9:34 PM

    Thanks, Teri! I guess you could call it a talent. Dwayne certainly thinks outside the lox. Ar ar - get it? Isn't lox a fish? That's pretty bad when you have to explain your own puns....

    ReplyDelete

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