I’m not a big television watcher, but over the holidays I watched a bit more than usual while wrapping Christmas presents. And I am surprised at what’s out there.
There’s “Ghost Adventures,” an oxymoronic show if I ever saw one, because, really, how adventurous can dead people be? But the show must be incredibly popular since it seems to be on all the time every evening. In this case, grown men appear to walk around shouting insults at dark buildings. Don’t get me wrong—I grew up in a haunted house, which makes it hard not to believe in ghosts, but these particular ghosts just never seem very lively. I watch, though, because I keep hoping at least one of them will show up for their television debut.
Then I discovered that there is such a thing as “Barbie Channel.” Channel. 'Nuff said there.
Weirdest of all was something called “Nighttime Programs for Baby.” Apparently television sets are now a staple of baby’s layette, and we must start training little crib potatoes as soon as they are just this side of the womb. I actually watched Nighttime Programs for Baby until the music made me feel colicky. It wasn’t too strong on plot, but it appeared to be made up of trippy little vignettes that were sort of artistically appealing in some cases. On the whole, though, I thought it insulted babies’ intelligence.
Of course, even that plot might just be better than the show called “Best Bra Ever,” but I can’t bring myself to watch that one, even as valuable blog research.
Last but not least of entertaining show names involved the Naughty Channels. I don’t subscribe to those, but apparently my satellite provider thinks it will tempt me by showing me the names. And I have to admit, some of them make me laugh myself silly. Problem is, I found very few I'd feel comfortable posting on my blog. Fortunately my personal favorite was the publishable “Naughty Golf Champ.” I imagine this one was specifically made for those men who wish to combine their passions, so to speak, much like the Seinfeld episode where George tries to combine sex and deli meats.
Have you discovered any weird TV programs lately?
Sadly, we no longer get satellite/cable channels anymore, so the ridiculousness of the offering is limited. I did notice over my holiday break that there is a lot more hours of news during the day than there used to be. There must be people who want to spend half their life watching the news...How much can things change within an hour or two?
ReplyDeleteMy husband used to watch "Ice Road Truckers" and "The Deadliest Catch" and I would give him a lot of grief. "Okay, what exciting thing is going to happen THIS week? Oh no, more ice. More cold weather. More waves landing onto the boat." However, he probably thought "Project Runway" was inane, as well.
I've always thought the networks should crossover their shows. You know. Like have the Deadliest Catch crew compete on Project Runway. That sort of thing.
ReplyDeleteImagine The Sopranos competing between themselves as Ice Road Truckers. House could be the Naughty Golf Champ. MythBusters could provide the content for Nighttime Programs for Babies. The Greatest Loser could host the Best Bra Ever show. The list goes on and on.
But I'm really guessing about all this. I actually don't watch any of these shows. Still. Just for blog research puposes. What channel was that golf show on? (ha)
Following the apparent popularity of a TV show about hoarders, HGTV came up with one about people who are almost hoarders, or hoarders in waiting. In another 25 or 30 years they'll be classed as hoarders, but right now they're just worse than I am at throwing things away.
ReplyDelete(Our dog likes HGTV, so we watch things like house-hunting in a foreign country while waiting for my husband to get home.)
K
Virgin Diaries. I only saw it once, on TLC. At the wedding, during, "You may kiss the bride," I thought they were going to eat each other's faces off like rabid wolverines.
ReplyDeleteIn the Seinfeld not-so-passionate pleasure-combining department...Kramer combined showering and eating.
I am laughing out loud!
ReplyDeleteSioux, I've noticed that about the news shows, too! And, um, I confess I did once watch "Deadliest Catch." Wait! No, it was "River Monsters." Whatever the guy caught, it was a gigantic and butt-ugly critter.
ReplyDeleteGood idea, Tom. But then "Myth Busters" might blow a hole through the baby crib with a cannon....
Oh Kay, really?? Almost-hoarders?! I laughed so hard at that...and the image of you and your dog watching "House Hunters" together.
And Val, speaking of images...! You're right--thank you for the reminder about Kramer in the shower. Seems to me there was a garbage disposal involved...?
Thanks for stopping by, Linda!
Myth Busters blowing a hold through a baby crib? Naw. Could never happen. It's all very scientifically done. Nothing left to chance.
ReplyDelete...Ah. Except for that one little time..
Hey! How about a crossover between "Chicken Soup for the Soul" and "Biker Billy Cooks with Fire?"
ReplyDelete...sorry. Couldn't resist!
What would that be, "Biker Chicks Barbeque with Soul?"
DeleteNaw. "Biker Billy's Fowl Hell Fire Gumbo"
DeleteSad but I use to watch Ghost Adventures and then Pete arrived (my ghost). I don't want anyone to insult Pete. :)
ReplyDeleteNow you have to come clean the spit coffee off my laptop! Best Bra Ever.... here's one for you. Read the channel listings in order, like they are describing something. "Best bra ever, lizard licking towers..." :D
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow
Maybe Pete arrived to watch his buddies on TV? Or maybe just for the channel reading....
DeleteI've never had so many channels with less things of interest to watch. Kind of miss the old basic 5-channel days.
ReplyDeletePat
Critter Alley
Isn't that the truth?? The more shows, the less interesting they seem to get!
DeleteI can't even describe some of the shows my husband's clicks on - I'm thinking, are these people for real? All of it drives me rather crazy. Unfortunately sometimes I get sucked in because I'm in such disbelief that something like that could be aired--what?
ReplyDeleteI know, me too. When I lived outside of Denver, there used to be prairie dog villages along the road, and the prairie dogs got hit by cars a lot. Their little bloated bodies were everywhere. I used to try so hard to look away, but I never could. For me some of those shows are just like that.
DeleteI don't watch TV except for the shows we DVR to watch later, i.e. NCIS, Criminal Minds, Psych, The Closer, Suits (my new favorite), and Hawaii 5-0 (my guilty pleasure). We never got into the reality TV stuff...no matter how idiotic Snookie is, trust me, she's still bright enough to know when the cameras are rolling, which makes it not reality at all. Not watching the reality stuff is my own little protest against people being paid good money to behave badly.
ReplyDeleteI'm with you, Lisa! That is, unless someone else is watching and it's like those aforementioned dead prairie dogs.
ReplyDelete