Writing is like being able to put life into a snow globe. It takes the things that are too big and scary and reduces them into a form that I can put away when I want and look at from a distance. It also takes all that’s good in life and captures it into something I can take out when I want and look at close up and keep forever. It makes the bad things into something I can hold…and the good things into something I can hold onto. Both help so much that I need that little souvenir of life.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Improper Poll: Along for the Ride

Since I'm officially tired of "Stuff," I’ve decided to start a new thing called Improper Poll.  Improper Poll is just an informal poll, usually about goofy things that have happened. Each week you will be invited to respond to a new topic with a short story or comment of your own. The only thing truly improper about Improper Poll, however, will be the silliness.

It'll be on Sundays. There won’t be a quote.

So here’s the first one. It comes from an incident that happened to me the other day when I discovered at work that I’d been walking around all day with a dryer sheet bunched up in my sleeve. I’m sorry to say this was not remotely the first time it’s happened, either. In fact, I have had the dryer sheet fall out of my pants leg in front of entire classes of teenagers, an event which I figure probably boosts my coolness quotient about a bagillion points to these young people, who probably can’t wait to be middle-aged themselves because I already make it look so cool.

Anyway. That got me thinking about a friend who once told me she often went all sorts of places after work, including swimming, so she used to keep entire changes of clothing in the trunk of her car. She told me she went to a party after swimming once, and a pair of panties fell out of the leg of her jumpsuit in front of everyone.

So today’s Improper Poll question for you is: Have you ever found something bunched up in your clothing?

Happy Sunday and have a great week!


  1. Yes. Dryer sheets and stray socks love to hitch a ride in my pants. I usually catch them as I put on my shoes.

    My teaching buddy trailed a pair of flowered cotton granny panties out her jeans leg for over half of an inservice day. Another teacher finally took pity and whispered it in her ear, right in the middle of an exercise where the entire 7-12 faculty formed a circle so we could all see each other as we voiced affirmations.

    But the BEST story belongs to my husband. He and my stepsons (then 12 and 14), planned to do some work around the barn. Hick, my husband, stepped into his coveralls that had been hanging on a nail. As the boys told it:

    "You should have seen him, Val! He reached his hands into his pockets, and let out a scream like a little girl. Then he started hopping around on one leg while he tried to get out of the coveralls. His hands were shaking, and he was almost crying. We couldn't understand him. So we looked in the pockets, and one of them was full of baby mice. They didn't even have hair on them, or have their eyes open yet. How can a grown man be afraid of baby mice?"

    Hick still doesn't like to talk about it.


  2. I have switched to the Bounce Dryer BAR for this very reason. I used to work in a department store - not Macy's but along the same lines - not fancy by national standards but fancy for where I live. We were required to dress up for work - either a dress or skirt and blouse or pants with a blouse and jacket. At any rate, I amassed a wardrobe that consisted of several silky (read staticky) blouses. One morning, in my haste to get to work, I pulled my outfit directly out of the dry, threw jacket on over my silk blouse and headed off to work.

    Later that day, I took my jacket off as I was beginning to overheat and low and behold there were a silky, slinky, lacey pair of panties stuck to my silky staticky blouse. My very young, very cute male co-worker plucked them from my back before anyone noticed.


  3. I can't think of anything other than a dryer sheet....rather boring, huh?

  4. Silk white granny panties in my pocket that I reached for when I felt a sneeze coming on. Snap, crackle pop, those staticky suckers unfurled like a surrender flag.

  5. Well, I'll have to tell on someone else since after a full meal, I can't think of anything other than Tums. My friend Joann Mannix (Laundry Hurts My Feelings) opened her hand bag in a store one day to take her wallet out and found one of her daughter's bras in it.
    I'll put on my thinking cap for next Sunday, but right now, I just want to get these tight pants away from my waste! Way too much family birthday partying tonight.

  6. WAIST! Oh dear God, I meant WAIST! Please don't let Old timer's start settling in on me!!

  7. Sorry, no, but I did once lose a half slip in the middle of a some college students (the elastic gave out). I quickly stepped out of it and shoved it into my purse...

  8. Oh, gosh...dryer sheets, check. Kleenex tissues (tucked up the sleeve "just in case" for easy access and then forgotten), check. A tampon (I thought I had it hidden on my way to the ladies' room...uh, yeah...not so much), check. I could probably think of more, but I don't want to frighten you. *sigh*

  9. Thank you all for sharing your hysterically funny stories!!! I don't know when I've laughed that hard...and then got to do it over and over again...!!!

  10. Sorry Tammy I'm late, life seems to be falling out of my clothing extremities :) I guess a flask falling out of pants leg while entering a college game doesn't count? I was not mine :)
    Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

  11. Does it count if you have two huge oil spots on the back of your pants as you're shopping in one of the ritziest malls in the city? My sister had to return a gift (as I don't shop there). I went to the restroom and saw myself in the mirror and couldn't believe that I had been at work and walked around all day with that on my behind. No one said a word!

  12. Other than the occasional sock stuck in a pant leg or the ever-popular dryer sheet magic act, no. My main problem is discovering that I'm wearing either different colored shoes or different colored socks. I try and pass it off as a new fashion trend.


  13. Hee hee...!!! Love it love it love it!!!


Any return "messages" are appreciated!